The summer months mean a lot of wonderful get-togethers. We attend weddings, family celebrations, reunions, time at cabins, vacations, BBQ’s, etc.  Tracy Visits would like to share a few suggestions/tips on helping make conversation time, with our elderly loved one’s gratifying, memorable, enjoyable and less stressful.

• Listen with your ears, eyes and compassionate heart. BE PATIENT.
• Make eye contact; sit at their level and focus on their words. Put away your cell phone. Avoid anything that will distract from the conversation. Speak slow.
• Be patient and wait for them to answer questions. Sometimes it takes a few moments for them to process and think about the question and their answer. Don’t get frustrated when events, dates or stories aren’t remembered. Try not to correct them. Be patient and remember; correct dates or how events happened….. isn’t critical. Stick to one topic at a time.
• Respect and love no matter where they are mentally or physically. The aging process with the ailments and physical limitations that go along with this are not asked for. Being sympathetic helps reduce the anxiety that goes along with these limitations. Speak louder if they are hearing impaired; but don’t shout.
• Be patient when hearing stories you may have already heard. We tell the same stories many times because they bring joy. Retelling funny and happy memories is wonderful for everybody; no matter the age. Let them share their joyful experiences!
• Remind them what a pleasure it is to spend time with them. Tell them you enjoy their stories and insight. Give them a hug, but be gentle as arthritis in shoulders and arms can be painful. 

 
When you spend time; giving someone a one-on-one conversation, you make them feel loved, important and valued.
 
Be patient and compassionate, time is a gift.
 

I would like to share a couple “gifts” Tracy Visits has received from some clients. Tracy Visits gives the Gift of Time to each of our clients, however, in return we receive some amazing gifts from our clients.

One of our clients, who is not very vocal; but she listens; looks; observes and will use two to three word comments during our visits. When our visits first began, I would ask for permission to give her a hug; now it is a two and three hug visit!  When I walk into the room she smiles and extends her arms out, waiting for a hug. This client has become more positive; engaging, and holds my hand. The feelings of trust and acceptance this client now has during our visits is the ongoing gift to Tracy Visits! This client has opened up enough to say, “I Love You”.  The family was amazed she said these words; truly a gift!

Another one of our clients is feeling so much trust and security in the relationship, we have built, that he has started to sing in front of me. A very private and proper gentleman who is now showing his love for music. He gives the gift of his funny songs and songs from musicals that he loved to watch during his life.  The hugs he gives are also now something he waits for when arriving for the visit and when the visit is over. His family shakes their heads learning that he is singing and giving hugs!

A gift we receive are comments from a client who says, “I miss you when you aren’t here” and “I will be waiting for you when you return.”  Comments like these are gifts because, we know, giving the much needed social interaction; the one-on-one visit, is so vital to our clients well-being. This client has become more calm and courteous to those around him because of the knowledge he will have a visit, twice a week, from someone he now trusts.

Knowing our visits, with our clients, are anticipated and so appreciated, brings such joy and affirmation that Tracy Visits is truly giving something that can’t be measured with material or monetary value. The benefits we are seeing, hearing and experiencing from our clients, from each visit, is a gift back to us!

As one clients’ son said, “you give him joy and purpose and the intimacy that no group activity, no medication, really nothing else can provide.”

A CARING VISIT WHEN YOU CAN’T...TRACY VISITS

www.tracyvisits.com

We are excited to announce our nomination for the 2018 I-94 West Chamber of Commerce Business & Community Excellence Innovation Award. This award is about Changing the establishment by introducing something better. Those recognized for Excellence in Innovation have made innovation part of their everyday ‘routine’ and provide tangible benefits in their work.

Loneliness and social isolation have been clearly linked to poor health outcomes. “A Review of Social Isolation” by Nicholas R. Nicholson published in The Journal of Primary Prevention, observes how “social isolation has been demonstrated to lead to numerous detrimental health effects in older adults, including increased risk for all-cause mortality, dementia, increase risk for rehospitalization, and an increased number of falls.”Ways to Help Seniors Avoid Social Isolation

Unfortunately, isolation among seniors is alarmingly common, and will continue to increase in prevalence as the population grows. Learn how to help your loved ones stay healthy by reading more on the top ways to help seniors avoid isolation.

Ways to Help Seniors Avoid Isolation

“A Review of Social Isolation” notes that the prevalence of isolation among “community dwelling older adults” or seniors who live at home rather than senior living communities, may be as high as 43%.

“With a prevalence of over 40% and the sheer number of older persons projected to increase exponentially… social isolation will likely impact the health, well-being and quality of life of numerous older person now and in the foreseeable future.”

Considering the demonstrated risks and the increasing prevalence of this issue, it’s certainly worth addressing how we can promote social integration among our older loved ones, and even ourselves — for it has been shown that family caregivers are themselves at a high risk of social isolation.

Here are the top ways to promote connectedness and social health:

1. Make Transportation Available

Lack of adequate transportation is a primary cause of a social isolation. Because many seniors do not drive, this is a big issue for them, so anything that helps seniors get around and make independent choices about travel promotes their social health. Creating a solid public transportation infrastructure and providing special transportation options to seniors and disabled people will help promote their social integration. For example, our blog recently reported that giving free buses to seniors promotes their health. Family offering rides to older loved ones and helping them to learn to use public transportation will also help them maintain social connections and a healthy sense of independence.

2. Promote Sense of Purpose

Seniors with a sense of purpose or hobbies that interest them are less likely to succumb to the negative effects of social isolation. Besides providing a sense of purpose, many hobbies and interests are inherently social in nature. Anything that involves a group, for example, playing bridge, could be said to be socially healthy. If a senior is bereft of ideas for what to do, there are always planned events at the local senior center. Volunteering is also great way of maintaining and expressing a sense of purpose. Encouraging seniors to remain active in their hobbies and interests, and providing them opportunities to volunteer can help them maintain their sense of purpose and keep them from becoming isolated and lonely.

3. Encourage Religious Seniors to Maintain Attendance at their Places of Worship

For seniors who have been regular churchgoers, this weekly social connection has been shown to be quite beneficial. Nicholson’s review observed that many studies have shown the benefits of churchgoing for seniors: “Those frequently attending religious services have been found to have lower mortality rates than those with infrequent attendance.” Older church goers not only benefit from the social interaction and sense of purpose that weekly worship provides, but they also benefit from the watchful eye of other churchgoers, who are likely to recognize a decline in an isolated senior that may have gone unnoticed otherwise.

4. Give a Senior Something to Take Care Of

Many experts note that the act of nurturing can relieve feelings of social isolation. In the peer reviewed paper “Emotional Benefits of Dog Ownership,” Eve Beals succinctly outlines the benefits of nurturing a pet: “Pet owners remain engaged socially, have less depression, suffer less loneliness, feel more secure, have more motivation for constructive use of time and require less medication than non-pet owners. Animal companionship facilitates establishing friends, is a social lubricant, gives a reason to get up in the morning and is an icebreaker.” Obviously, you would need to make certain that the senior is capable and willing to properly care for the pet before giving a pet as a gift. Assuming the senior is capable of caring for a pet, nurturing and caring for an animal companion can be quite beneficial. Even tending a garden can satisfy our nurturing drive, so giving a senior a plant or gardening supplies as a gift can be beneficial too.

5. Encourage a Positive Body Image

Nicholson’s review notes that some research has shown that many older adults avoid social interaction because of a poor body image. “Individuals with a poor body image attributable to being overweight may decrease or cease interactions with their social networks to the point where they could be at risk for social isolation. For example, individuals who are overweight may be self-conscious or embarrassed, and, therefore, less likely to engage in their social networks.” Compliments and positive comments can go a long way to boosting the self-esteem of seniors. Similarly, discouraging seniors from fretting over their appearance or catastrophizing the cosmetic effects of aging may help them avoid becoming self-conscious to the point that they avoid social interactions. For seniors who are genuinely overweight, addressing the root problem by encouraging weight loss through healthy eating and exercise can be helpful too, but always be positive and sensitive in efforts to encourage older loved ones to lose weight.

6. Encourage Hearing and Vision Tests

Seniors with undiagnosed or untreated hearing problems may avoid social situations because of difficulty communicating or embarrasment. Encourage seniors to have their hearing checked and hearing problems treated. A hearing aid may be the only barrier between a senior and better social health. Vision tests are important too as sight problems “limit opportunities for social interactions with others” according Nicholson’s landmark review on social isolation research.

7. Make Adaptive Technologies Available

Adaptive technologies, ranging from walkers to the above mentioned hearing aids, help seniors to compensate for age related deficits and deficiencies that can impede social interaction. Many seniors do not take full advantage of these devices. Sometimes they may be embarrassed because they don’t want to appear or feel old. In other cases, the device may be overly expensive and not covered by insurance. Both as a society and in our own families we can encourage and facilitate the use of adaptive aids that make it possible for seniors to have active and involved social lives.

8. Notify Neighbors

Because socially isolated seniors may be vulnerable to a variety of unexpected problems and may have underlying issues such as dementia, their loved ones should consider informing members of the community that there is a vulnerable adult in the neighborhood. Trusted neighbors within a block radius or so should be introduced to the senior if feasible, informed about any particular issues the senior may have, and asked to keep a friendly eye out in case anything seems amiss.

9. Encourage Dining with Others

The act of eating with others is inherently social. In “Food and Eating: An Anthropological Perspective,” Robin Fox writes that eating is “a profoundly social urge. Food is almost always shared; people eat together; mealtimes are events when the whole family or settlement or village comes together. Food is also an occasion for distributing, giving and sharing for the expressing of altruism, whether from parents to children, children to in-laws, or anyone to visitors and strangers.” Encourage seniors to share a meal with others whenever possible, whether it’s with a church group, the local senior center, or a friendly cafe or diner. Dining with others is also likely to help promote better nutrition, which is crucial for the elderly.

10. Address Incontinence Issues

For obvious reasons, a senior who experiences incontinence may be hesitant to leave their home and could become isolated. When family caregivers and health professionals make sure that incontinence issues are appropriately addresses, for example through medications and incontinence supplies, seniors can have a better opportunity to recognize their social potentials and live life without embarrassment and fear of going into public.

11. Give a Hug

There’s nothing like a hug from grandma. Research has shown that friendly platonic touching from friends and family, like hand holding or hugging, can lower stress and promote feelings of well-being. On the other hand, people deprived of touch can experience decreased well-being. So even if you or your older relatives are not the touchy-feely types, at the very least weave a friendly hug into your greetings and farewells.

12. Give Extra Support to Seniors Who Have Recently Lost a Spouse

Older adults may be at highest risk for becoming socially isolated during the period after a spouse has passed away. When you’ve shared your life with a beloved spouse and companion for decades, it can be like losing the foundation of your existence when that person dies. For this reason, it’s important to provide extra emotional and social support to recent widows and widowers while they are grieving. Do more than bring flowers; go the extra mile and spend more time with the senior in the days and weeks following his or her loss. This can make all the difference for the bereaved senior’s well-being, and it helps to encourage a healthy grieving process rather than a spiral into prolonged depression and isolation.

13. Identification of Socially Isolated Seniors by Public Health Professionals

Often family members will be the first to notice when social isolation is affecting a senior’s well-being, but not all seniors have the benefit of loved ones who live nearby and can check on their well-being. For this reason, public health professionals should be on the lookout for signs of social isolation problems in their clients and patients so that appropriate interventions can be arranged. After all, nothing can be done to help socially isolated seniors if no one recognizes that they are socially isolated. Beck Squires notes in an article for AARP that health professionals should be especially aware of social isolation in particular groups of older adults, such as gay and lesbian seniors who are unlikely to have grown-children who can help oversee their well-being or spot signs of social isolation.

14. Help Out a Caregiver in Your Life

Family caregivers who are helping to care for an elderly loved one probably don’t consider themselves seniors and are also probably more concerned about the social well-being of the person they are caring for than their own social well-being. But many caregivers are 50+ and caregiving itself can actually trigger social isolation. In Squires’ AARP article, she summarizes the social and health risks of caregiving: “Caregivers often work by themselves, and more than half (53%) say they have less time for friends and family. All too often, they don’t call doctors when they are sick, and they have little or no time to exercise or eat well. Studies show that up to 70% of caregivers have clinically significant symptoms of depression.” If you are a caregiver, remember to take care yourself. It’s not just the person you are caring for who’s at risk of social isolation, it is you. And if you know a caregiver, or a loved one in your family shoulders the burden of caregiving for an elderly family member, take whatever steps you can to make that person’s life easier and to allow them to have a social life of their own.

Have you helped a senior loved one overcome isolation?

It is with a very heavy and sad heart that Tracy Visits says good bye to a dear man.

Mr. H. has been a client for 2 ½ years. He had a calm, courteous and kind personality. Over the time we visited, there were telling of jokes, life and work experiences stories, travel stories, his service to our country stories, countless card games, trivia questions, reading daily horoscopes, betting on big sports games, looking at video clips of old movies, looking at pictures of places all over the world, watching videos of Naval operations, etc. All of these and more, are all treasured conversations and times we spent together. Hearing Mr. H. talk of his life was not only fascinating but very educational, at times funny and spell-bounding. He stated many times, “most ask Why? I ask, Why Not?” He truly was one who embraced new experiences throughout his life.

Developing and enjoying our unique friendship has been amazing.

My life has been enriched and truly blessed because of the opportunity of getting to know you and share in your life. I will miss your hugs and sweet smile. Thank you for sharing your stories and time with me.

Mr. H., you will be sincerely missed.

We all know that each new year brings new challenges, new jobs, new friendships,
new relationships, new goals, etc... 

However, we do know one thing that won’t change in 2018 is the love we have for
our loved ones in care facilities.  Make 2018 a year that you set aside time,
each month, to visit those loved ones you may not have visited in the past.
Jobs, travel, kids, activities, etc keep us all busy, with everyday life.
We know this will never change.

Spending even 30 minutes, of your time, with those that can’t get out and socialize like the rest of the world can, will bring them a priceless gift.

Love your loved ones with a visit.

Make 2018 a year that you give the gift of time.

Let Tracy Visits help you the other weeks of the month.
A caring and compassionate visit with your loved one when you can’t.

Call 612-791-0133

Tracy Visits is truly giving the gift of time to your loved ones.